My Favorite Fantasy Creature Horror

Death of Unicorn opens this weekend and reminds me that there are dozens of great horror movies about fantastical creatures from our most beloved children’s tales. These movies aren’t just fractured fairy tales, no, some of these are gruesome horror gems, worthy of an ogre’s eye.

Most supernatural creautures have the ability to disconcern bad people from the good people in ways we wish we could (it would be so useful these days). Supernatural justice is swift, decisive, and irreversible. In most cases, 1000% deserving. It’s perhaps the whole reason why some of us love horror movies.

Warning for jump scare junkies, my list runs the gambit of horror subgenres, so grab the popcorn, turn out the lights, and forget what the Grimm Brothers taught you about mythical beings.

The Company of Wolves – A dark provocative, twisted retelling of Red Riding Hood with werewolves, set in 18th century. This is British goth horror at its finest, directed by the legendary Neil Jordan and starring Angela Lansbury as grandma, of course! One of my all-time faves!

The Ritual – Probably the best true horror film on this list. Four college grads still mourning the tragic loss of their friend, head out to hike the Scandinavian wild in search of inner peace and find ancient evil instead. I’m not going to give away the mythological creature cuz it’s so good when you figure it out.

Spring – One of best rom-horror ever made. It’s suprisingly tender story of a young man who finds love with a mysterious woman in Italy while mourning the recent loss of his mother. This sweet romantic tale starring Lou Taylor Pucci and Nadia Hilker, sometimes makes you forget you’re watching a scary film.

Pan’s Labyrinth – Guillermo Del Toro’s
magnum opus features classic elements of horror, war drama, and fairy tales. Del Toro himself considers it a parable. Set in Francoist Spain, the story of young girl who falls into a dark labyrinth filled with terrifying magical creatures is the greatest example of dark fantasy/horror and an absolute must watch movie.

Gretel & Hansel – This might be the scariest retelling of the classic children’s tale ever produced. Directed by Osgood Perkins, the movie is heavy on atmosphere and mood, rather than action (at least until the end) and focuses on the untapped power of Gretel battling the evil witch, who is seriously got to be one of the scariest witches of all time on film.

Antlers – An original story about a troubled little boy harboring a dark secret and the sad ordinary people trying to help before finding themselves sucked into deadly world of a wendigo. Everyday man Jesse Plemons leads an all-star cast in this underrated horror gem, produced by Guillermo Del Toro and David S. Goyer. Acting, production quality, story, and scares are top notch. I believe the wendigo is one of the scariest mythical creatures and have longed for a good adaptation of the folklore. This is the best so far.

Troll Hunter – Norweigan horror film about a group of college students who set out to do a documentary of a legendary bear hunter Hans. After an attack, Hans is forced to reveal the truth that he’s not actually out looking for bears, he’s hunting trolls! This thoroughly original mockumentary style horror is utterly brilliant in the way it brings the fictional creature to life with such seriousness, I now wonder what’s out there in the deep dark woods.

The Hallow – Dark fantasy horror about a conservationist who travels to remote Ireland with his wife and baby, only to meet hostile locals who warn the man about the region’s Hallow, fairies, banshees, and baby-stealing fae. It doesn’t take long before the couple are battling the Hallow’s underworld to save their child. Out of all mythical beings, fairies are the most ambiguous. Some are good, some are bad, some are mischievous. Corin Hardy’s directorial debut is one of best and scariest fantasy horrors depicting bad fairies.

The Lure – Insanely odd Polish fantasy film about two mermaids who crawl out of the ocean to join a rock band in a club during the 1980s. It might be light on scares, but the cringe factor is a ten and it’s total trip.

Leprechaun – This is best of 90s campy slasher horror starring pre-Friends ingenue Jennifer Aniston and Warwick Davis having ridiculous fun portraying the devilishly witty leprechaun who doesn’t let any humans get in his way while chasing his gold. Anything that can launch an 8 film franchise, whether they’re good or not, is gold in my book!

Happy World Storytelling Day!

I always love March because it gives me a chance to mention my favorite spooky creature, the headless horseman. You mean the guy from that story with Ichabod? Yes, that guy! The Legend of Sleepy Hollow written by Washington Irving was most likely inspired by the legendary Dullahan, a menacing spectre of Irish lore, that travels the countrysides of Ireland and Scotland, collecting souls of the recently departed.

The Dullahan is a demonic fairy or wicked hobgoblin, often accompanied by a wailing banshee, and typically depicted riding a black horse, carrying his head under one arm and a whip made of boney human spine in the hand of the other. When the Dullahan calls out your name, death is nigh. It’s also said that just hearing or seeing the Dullahan is an omen that a death in the family is immenient.

Sometimes, the headless horseman is drives a silent black carriage, known as the coiste bodhar (Ireland) or the hell wain (Scotland), which is led by six black horses and emerges out of nowhere from the dark night sky. Legend says once the death coach sets out, it can never return empty, but if you carry even a single gold coin in your pocket, you have nothing to fear, for supposedly, any item made of real gold can send the Dullahan away. However, if you steal the entire pot of fairies’ gold, well…look to the skies.

Of all the Irish legends, the story of the Dullahan is by far the scariest, again, inspiring the legendary Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow and countless other stories, books, movies, comics, video games, you name it. There are four movies featuring the Dullahan or coiste bodhar, the banshee, and other creatures that I absolutely adore and highly recommend. Be sure to move these into your queue:

Walt Disney’s Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad, 1949

Tim Burton’s Sleepy Hollow, 1999

Darby O’Gill and the Little People

The Phantom Carriage, 1921 (silent)

St Patrick’s day may have past, but we can keep the mythical stories of Irish folklore alive all year long.

Monthy Haiku – March

I always love March because it gives me a chance to mention my love of my favorite spooky creature, the headless horseman. You mean the guy from that story with Icabod? Yes, that guy! The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washibgton Irving was based off old Irish legend of the Dullahan, a spectre of Irish lore who drives the death coach, collecting souls of the recently departed.

stolen fairy gold
the dullahan’s midnight ride
death coach approaches

Haiku of the Week

Part IV and the conclusion of the March Mischief series.

black death carriage
ale with the dullahan
pub crawl continues

Haiku of the Week

Our theme this month is creatures of the deep. I spent the weekend watching sea creature movies and lamenting over the fact, that despite now having the technology, we still do not have an awesome modern-day Kraken movie. What up Mr. Speilberg, are you busy?

“Kraken attacks ship” by Samuel Allan, created for PBS Digital – Monstrum, Episode 5

Artist: Samuel Allan
Instagram: @samuel_allan_illustrator

To view more fantastical art by Samuel Allan, please visit:
samuelallan.artstation.com

To purchase merchandise:
https://samuelallan.onlineweb.shop/

Cryptid Monster Marathon – Monstrous, The Retreat, and Dawn of the Beast Movie Reviews

After missing my own self-imposed deadlines in January and February, where I was to present a movie review for the month, I am determined not to miss March! Thus, I decided to triple down and do three movie reviews in celebration of our legendary creatures theme.

The truth is, earlier this March, I watched Dawn of the Beast, but it was only when I started writing the review did I realize the movie was actually the third cryptid monster film, following Monstrous and The Retreat, all directed by Bruce Wemple. Naturally, I had to watch the other two films.

Armed with a great love for campy horror films and his trusty cast of relative unknowns, New York director Bruce Wemple creates fresh horror that makes the socially conscious Gen Z crowd proud. All boxes checked. Wemple knows all the horror tropes, and these films felt like proper indie horror movies. There was decent acting, strong female characters, and lots of action. The camerawork makes good use of those shadows, close-up shots, and practical effects to perpetuate the scares and despite the low budget, the production quality was pretty good. I was even forgiving of the few man-in-a-monster-suit shots, which were super cheesy, but hey look, considering the third film was entirely developed during the pandemic, all of us should be impressed by that. I’ll be honest, I never gave much thought to Adirondack mountains before watching these films, and whatever location Wemple chose to shoot on location is some damn beautiful country. If I wasn’t so scared of the real Wendigo, I’d run out and buy a Winnebago.

There’s a lot of good psychological horror here too, especially in the second film, The Retreat. The biggest flaw of this cryptid trilogy was the films suffered from having too much story. I guess having too much story is better than having no story, right? It’s just these long drawn out or overly heavy exposition scenes take away our monster time, and when you make a feature film starring these two legendary creatures, you have got to have more monster!!

I should also mention upfront, each of these movies is stand-alone. You’ll understand each of them on their own just fine, but movie marathons are so much more fun.

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June Gloom Picture Challenge

“Some said the thunder called the lurking fear out of its habitation, while others said the thunder was its voice.” – H.P. Lovecraft

In this volatile world filled with ominous creatures and unknown dangers, the fine line between madness and reason evaporates with the arrival of the lurking fear.
Curious humans stumble upon Mother Nature’s guardians, as they watch over the gates of the abyss, only to become prey to Summer’s haunting season.

Head on over to Instagram and post your favorite pics/photos representing June Gloom. Both art pics and photos are allowed this time around. Don’t forget to credit the artists when you can.

Join in any day and don’t forget to tag your pics using #junegloompicchallenge

June Gloom Pic Challenge

Season’s Greetings from Halloween Haiku

Happy holidays! After the busy Halloween season, it was good to take a little break in November and gear up for December festivities. I’ve mentioned before that I think Christmas and Halloween are close cousins. They go hand-in-hand and mix well like peanut butter and jelly. Point in case, Tim Burton’s classic Nightmare Before Christmas. There’s plenty to do and see during the holidays that appeal to Halloweenophiles, so there’s no need to reject December or feel blue. Get creative! Haunted holidays is an awesome theme for decorations. Make Halloween themed Christmas cookies. Make a scary gingerbread house. Watch a scary Christmas movie, and who doesn’t love shopping for cool Halloween items to fill your gothic or black stocking up with? Lastly, there’s the iconic Krampus. The antithesis of jolly Santa Clause. He’s scarier than any Universal monster and twice as old.

This month, is basically a chance for second Halloween. So, check back often. Halloween Haiku is going to have plenty of new haiku, fun stuff and cool ideas that our pumpkin-loving hearts will enjoy.

Have yourself a scary little Christmas and beware of Krampus!

The Ten Creepiest Urban Legends

Urban legends are stories that are meant to scare us and typically serve as a warning or have some type of moral lesson attached. Every state has their own urban legends, some states even share legends, changing the details to fit their locale or whichever narrative is needed, but the core plot stay the same. The ones I have chosen for this list are the creepiest found in the USA, and some of them are based on real-life true stories! Can you figure out which ones?

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Turn on the Light

After partying most of the night, a co-ed decides to spend the night with a boy she met at the party. She returns to dorm room to retrieve her keys, careful not to wake her roommate. In the dark room she can hear the sleeping roommate’s heavy breathing and assumes she’s got a cold. When she returns the next day, she finds her roommate’s dead body and the note written in blood on the wall, “Aren’t you glad you didn’t turn on the light?”

This story is sometimes told with the co-ed being more studious and returning to retrieve a book for an all-night study session, but the end-result is always the same. This legend has been around 50 years or more and most likely was started by a parent worried about their college-bound kid.

Moral of the Story: Screw your roommate’s feelings, always turn on the damn light.

Licked Hand

One night, a woman who lives alone with her nice little dog, hears on the radio that an escaped lunatic is on the loose in her town. She locks up the house tight and goes to bed with her faithful canine companion, who stays close by her bedside all night. When the woman wakes the next morning, she finds her pooch slaughtered and note written in blood on the bathroom mirror, “Humans can lick too.”

Some variations of this legend feature an old woman and sometimes, a young girl. Sometimes she wakes in the middle of the night, hearing a dripping sound, and sometimes, the pet is alive and well at the end. Like the ‘Turn on the Light’ legend, the killer rubs the survivor’s nose in the fact that they barely escaped death.

Moral of the Story: You’re never going to be in control of your own death and maybe you should get a cat.

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